My friend Abi lives by a phrase she learned in kindergarten: “Don’t yuck on someone’s yum.” If yuck signifies something bad and yum signifies something good, then the rule is simple: don’t be mean about what makes someone else happy. Since coming to Vanderbilt, I have quickly learned that the version of “southern” you are is highly predictive as to whether you get a “yuck” from the people here.

The American South, particularly the “Deep South” of Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia and South Carolina, is often the subject of criticism around the nation. Like many Southerners, I’ve heard my fair share of these critiques of the South and have even joined in a handful of times. Some of that scrutiny reflects real and painful histories. Our historical ties to the enslavement of African Americans and subsequent Jim Crow laws inform continued systemic disenfranchisement while our education system suffers a continual lack of resources, including economic inequities and the “drain brain” that draws talent elsewhere.

Vanderbilt’s positioning in Nashville makes it distinctly southern, something further solidified by our iconic hot fried chicken and our participation in the illustrious Southeastern Conference. Many have grown to love this region’s country music, southern hospitality, sweet tea and, of course, the iconic “y’all.” But, as a Mississippi State University graduate who joked about opting to keep their education “in the SEC” by attending Vanderbilt, it was shocking to me how many students seem to disdain the South, other than the occasional trip to Hattie B’s, of course.

Since getting to Vanderbilt in August, I have seen fairly mild responses to telling people I grew up on a farm in rural Alabama. While it does seem to surprise people a bit, the responses are often limited to soft smiles and what seems to be a smidge of pity. Other than hearing someone poke fun at a conference being in Florence, Alabama (which really is a lovely city if you visit —might I suggest stopping by Ricatoni’s?), this type of southern has yet to receive an outright “yuck.”

The explicit “yucks,” however, come in much stronger when I tell people that I picked Mississippi State University for my undergraduate degree. This choice, which was voluntarily and happily done, has received a resounding and quite genuine “oh, I’m sorry” (which, yes, was actually said to me) from an undergraduate after learning that I, along with my friend who went to Ole Miss, attended college in Mississippi. On another occasion, I overheard two girls walking on Alumni Lawn say, “Hail State,” my undergrad’s version of “Anchor Down.” I was incredibly shocked and disappointed when I sped up in excitement only to discover they were mocking a girl who wrote our rally cry on a piece of paper, saying, “I know who she voted for.”

As a student who, like many others, hopes to make new relationships over my years here, interactions such as these are disheartening as my identity is reduced to a preconceived notion someone has of where I’m from. These previous exchanges have led me to prepare myself for the inevitable “yucks” when I meet someone new, responses which stem from a shallow understanding of the South and Southerners’ experiences in it.

What takes the prize as harshest “yuck”, though, is the feeling of contempt seeping off of students criticizing how a product of Alabama and Mississippi’s public schools could earn their place here, too.

Contrary to what sometimes feels like popular belief on this campus, you can’t have your cake and eat it, too. As demonstrated by our friends on Alumni Lawn, it would seem that some are eager to distance Vanderbilt from the South, and by extension, themselves. Some of these same students will treat the South as a four-year aesthetic experiment. However, you can’t eat cornbread and biscuits and set “Sweet Home Alabama” as your alarm while also judging and ostracizing someone who grew up with those traditions as something deeper than a novelty.

I challenge you to look at the South from eye level because it is quite easy to look down on something you’ve never given the respect to look at head on first. I challenge you to adopt some of our hospitality, welcoming people from all walks of life with kind, open arms. I can promise you a lot of us Southerners love our home and work hard to make it a better place each and every day. Because the South, especially Mississippi, is my yum. And I am tired of it being yucked on.